I’m dedicating this week to paying tribute to my Dad, scrapbooking our Celebration of Life for him, and recapping our family vacation to Idaho, per our kids’ request to have closure.
The introduction post of Paying Tribute to My Dad + our first day in Idaho, can be READ HERE.
For Day 2, you can READ HERE.
Ryan and I were up and at ’em pretty early and enjoying our morning view and quiet time with coffee.
While Ryan worked on his welcome and closing messages for the Celebration of Life, I worked on writing a eulogy for my dad. It was a mixture of angst at what I was actually having to do, and a sense of privilege to be able to testify about his life and his impact on me as his daughter. I have realized about myself, once I can get over the hump of getting started, I can gain momentum. This held true for this responsibility, thankfully.
We had set up chairs and tables the day before, and when we came out the next morning, we realized the sprinkler system had gone on, drenching everything. We only had minimal effort to dry things, such as the tablecloths, but still.
Our first morning in Coeur d’Alene, we went out to breakfast to Le Peep Cafe.
It was just outside of downtown, on the Spokane River.
Their eggs were nothing to call home about, and while their breakfast potatoes didn’t look appealing, they tasted amazing! If we had to vote, Noah’s “French Toast Sticks” were the clear breakfast winner…
…and most creative plate goes to Josiah’s “Funny Face Pancakes”…
Here’s the breakfast crew…
My aunt and uncle, who go by “Mima” and “P-pa”, stayed at the house with us over the weekend. They helped raise me, so I grew up with my cousin, Jason, more as a sibling rather than a cousin. So my aunt and uncle feel like grandparents to my kids.
Once we returned back to the house, it was go-time.
All hands on deck. Getting the tables decorated and places set. I found those cute 3D wood moose decor on Amazon and had them shipped directly to my aunt’s.
I asked each of my kids to take a special part in the ceremomy, and it was so sweet to see them rise to the occasion and honor Grandpa Seaward.
Most of the Seaward side of the family was there…
My cousin/brother Jason and I. Endless childhood stories with this guy! 🤣
Also in attendance were my dad’s neighbors, his house cleaner and friend, colleagues from the police department, and friends from Reagan Republicans.
As well as my friends, Jen and Kristina, whom we’ve known each other since middle school…
It was such a comfort to be surrounded by people I love, and to get to meet people who were part of my dad’s life in Idaho.
Immediately following the service we had refreshments and then dinner catered by Angelo’s Ristorante, a local Italian restaurant that was recommended by mutliple people during our hunt for a caterer. It did not disappoint! All the food is prepared with organic ingredients, mostly locally grown, and handmade from scratch. Angelo actually was the on-site caterer, and we learned that many ingredients come out of his organic garden from his property .
Served with refreshments was an amazing Antipasto Platter…
There was so much more to this appetizer not shown in this picture, salami, marinated mushrooms, olives, to name a few.
For dinner, there was the most amazing breaded lemon chicken, filet mignon with blue cheese, greek pasta salad and the quinoa salad was to die for! It also fed us for the remainder of the week.
For dessert, the options were a flourless chocolate cake with whipped cream and a dot of raspberry sauce, as well as lemon bars with huckleberries and whipped cream.
Huckleberries are an Idaho staple. Tasting much like a blueberry, they are the state fruit.
Our evening ended with being full and happy, the Celebration of Life couldn’t have felt more honoring to my Dad. I was so thankful for all of the help to pull it together, it was simple, informal, paid tribute to his life and the things that he would have cared about, all of the things that my Dad would have been satisfied with.
We spent the rest of the evening hanging out by the beach talking and reminiscing, while the kids played in the lake…
…and then we called it a night. It was a success!
I have included my eulogy and Alexia’s sweet opening prayer that she prepared, for keepsakes…
Eulogy for My Dad:
Hello. As I stand here, I see friends and family that have come great distances to be here for my dad. I am humbled and quite frankly impressed that he drew such a crowd. My husband, Ryan and I, and our four kids, Alexia, Naiya, Noah and Josiah, are so grateful to be here with you celebrating in such a beautiful place, Coeur d’Alene, that my dad came to know and love.
In the months leading up to this Celebration of Life, I poured through old photos and memorabilia, and was reminded of all the different facets of who Larry Seaward was.
First and foremost, he was a dad. My Dad. Despite the long list of irritating things I could have listed as a teenage daughter, now as an adult with my own kids, I realize just how much sacrifice and commitment went into raising a stubborn, fly-by-the-seat-of-her-pants girl, such as myself. As many of you know, my dad raised me as a single father. The fact that he survived that, is a testament to his determination and fortitude!
He centered most of his life around raising me. And I’m confident if asked, he would say one of his biggest accomplishments in life, was raising a daughter. He would also immediately follow it with attributing all his grey hair, or lack thereof, to this endeavor as well.
The different forms of love and support from my dad that stand out in my mind include:
- Devoting almost every weekend, year-round, to soccer tournaments all across northern California and beyond, for 13+ years.
- He would later go on to flying cross-country to watch me play soccer at West Virginia University.
- He navigated and endured being a Soccer Dad amidst a sea of Soccer Moms, through humor and sarcasm, and could handle a gaggle of girls that talked 90 miles an hour, like it was nobody’s business.
- The few times in my teenage life, where I made some poor decisions, his usual Type A response was actually softened, and instead was one of deep compassion and a short admonition of “let’s learn from this, and don’t do it again.”
- If my dad was anything, he was organized, had a plan, was devoted to routines, liked to be in charge, was committed to the details, and punctual to the core. So much so, that he would have us arriving 3 hours early to any domestic flight we took, labels with his name and title were stuck to any and every possession under his care, and when I told him I was moving out to Maryland after being home from college for almost a year, his first response was, “Well, what is your plan for a job?” I of course had no plan other than I would wing it and figure it out when I got there. Which I did. But not before he forced me to switch all of my bills and financial responsibilities to my name. He was a smart man, who knew how to navigate having an only-child that had the stubbornness of a first-born, the attitude of a middle child, and the entitlement of the youngest child. I was his perfect storm.
As I reflect on my dad’s life, I am most proud of his service to the Army, his dedication to his careers at Pacific Bell, and later Tollgrade Communications, his love for keeping a tidy home, an impeccable yard, his enjoyment of gardening, his ability to make people laugh with a sarcastic comment, and his quickness to laugh at himself. There’s nothing that I enjoyed more with my dad, then doubling over in laughter at some random mishap. Recounting funny memories was a favorite pastime of ours.
My dad’s choice to move to Idaho was intentional, as he desired to to be out of California, out from underneath a mortgage, and take on an independent adventure in a more rugged, down-home part of the country, where the American flag flew high and it was legal to pack heat in public. I watched Idaho become home for my dad, surrounded by a like-minded community such as the Reagan Republicans, and he found such satisfaction in volunteering, and later working part-time, for the Coeur d’Alene Citizens on Patrol. He had arrived, found his people, and had a badge to prove it!
We watched my dad evolve into a true Idahoan. He bought a truck, suffered and complained through the snow from November through March (he always made sure that we knew when it was time to put studded snow tires on), he surprised us all when he dressed up as Santa Claus each Christmas for the police department. The final and true sign of this evolution came when he started identifying as a native Idahoan and complaining about “all those Californians moving to Idaho.”
There were things that we came to know as “Larryisms”, such as putting Tabasco on and in everything. The time that most stands out in my mind is when he made my cousin, Jason, and I mac and cheese and stirred Tabasco into it before serving. Needless to say, it went uneaten. While my dad loved to BBQ, he often ate and served undercooked chicken (hello salmonella), as well as almost burned down his back porch on more than one occasion. He was known to makeup random facts and present them as truth, to which our family would often google fact-check him. Sometimes we would just let the story lie.
Even so, I am so proud of the man my dad was, I am proud to be a Seaward, and while our family is certainly not perfect, I wouldn’t trade all the banter and laughs for the world! I am proud to pass on this humor, feistiness, compassion, doggedness and ability to laugh with others, at others, and at ourselves, to my kids and hopefully their kids.
Before I close, I wanted to make a few corrections to my dad’s obituary. I would like to blame the mistakes on grief which is probably half true, but I believe if my dad were with us today, he would conclude to you all that it had more to do with my lack of attention to certain details. If you are a math major, you more than likely have realized that if my dad was born in 1952, that would make him 69, not 68, at the time of passing. And while my dad was an E-4 when he was discharged from active duty in the Army after the Vietnam War, he did go on to promote to Master Sergeant E-8, while serving in the Army Reserves. I apologize for those mistakes, and wanted to make sure I clarified in order to honor him after his death.
What I will miss most is being able to pick up the phone and tell my dad about a recent accomplishment of one of his grandchildren, or laugh with him about the latest mishap.
I am so grateful for everyone that has come here today. I want to thank each of you from the bottom of my heart.
I also want to publicly thank my husband, Ryan, who tirelessly tied up all of the loose ends after my dad passed. With numerous trips from our home in Maryland to Idaho, to take care of my dad’s estate, countless hours of being on the phone dealing with all of the legal stuff, taking care of all the logistics of securing a venue here, rentals, etc., for this Celebration of Life. I want to thank him and my kids as well, as you cared for me so tenderly throughout the waves of grief these last 8 months.
I want to thank my Uncle Mike and Aunt Ilene for caring my dad in his last year or two of life here in Idaho. With frequent lunch or dinner dates, checking in on him, and loving him as your older brother. You two balance with such grace, love, care and responsibility while also giving him freedom to make his own decisions and be himself.
I also want to thank my Aunt Debbi, Uncle Griff, and Jason. Words cannot express my gratefulness for taking me in as your very own daughter and sister, and treating my kids as your own grandchildren and second cousins. There is no doubt I would be a far different person, in a far different place, if it were not for your choice to commit to loving me as your own. You three are probably the most loyal humans on this planet and have shown me what family does for each other, because we’re family.
Thank you to my dad’s cousins and their spouses, Bob and Angie, Randi and Gary, for making the trip to celebrate my dad’s life.
Thank you to my junior high friends, Jen and Kristina, for taking time away from your busy family and lives, and coming to support me and pay tribute to my dad this weekend.
A special thanks to those of you here today from the Coeur d’Alene Police Department, Reagan Republicans, friends and neighbors, Toni my dad’s housecleaner and friend, he spoke so fondly of each of you, and I know you had a profound impact on him in his life here in Idaho.
Thank you all for being a part of my dad, Larry’s life, and for joining us today to honor and celebrate him.
Alexia’s Opening Prayer:
I couldn’t be more proud of Alexia, and my other three kids! Love them so much!
